Battles – Ramblings of a Sane but Angry Mind

“You may be 11 hours into a 12 hour shift and on your 25^th call but never forget, this is the FIRST emergency THAT person has had today.”

We all have our own personal battles.  Some we’re born into, some we just get by living and some we choose.  Are your battles more important than mine? Are mine more important than yours? No and No.  Are some battles bigger in the overall picture? Yes.  But does that make the smaller battles less significant to the person who is fighting them? Absolutely not!

Take a minute and think about what you battle with… hourly, daily, monthly, yearly.  I’m not going to make a list.  I want everyone to really think about their own lives.  Not mine, not your neighbors’, not the worlds’.  Just yours.

Everything you listed in your head is important to YOU.  EVERYTHING!  Has someone, somewhere probably battled the same thing? Yeah.  Did they come through it successfully? If they haven’t already, they probably will, eventually.  That’s just kind of how life works out.  We trudge through our daily routines and fight our battles, big & small, and we eventually come out on the other end.  Victorious because we survived.  Hopefully wiser.  Hopefully better off. However you got through it, with help from others, advise from wherever or just by the seat of your pants, you did it your way.  Good Job!

Now that you’ve been thinking about yourself for a bit, broaden your thoughts to other people.  Remember, they all have their own battles.  They all are making their way with the best information that they have at this very moment in time.  Do you watch from the sidelines and think to yourself, “That was stupid. Why in the world did she do that?”  Yes, sometimes we do.  And that’s OK.  But do you jump off the bench, screaming and yelling, “You idiot!  You’ll never succeed that way! What a total moron you are! Do it this way!”  Well I certainly hope not because if you do, you are not helping the situation at all and in fact, you have probably just added another battle to that person’s life.

Empathy – Understanding what others are feeling because you have experienced it yourself.

Sympathy – Acknowledging another’s hardships (battles) and offering comfort and assurance.

Both empathy and sympathy must be offered without judgement. Period.  There cannot be “I’ve been through that same thing, but….” Or “I can only imagine how hard that must be, but….”

This all being said, there has been much gnashing of teeth lately over Marginalized Groups and Allies. Being in both groups gives me a little perspective but not all the answers.  There are no pat answers on how members of either group should fight their battles.  It is up to EACH of us to EMPATHIZE & SYMPATHIZE. Sometimes we walk holding each other’s hands.  Sometimes we carry each other. And sometimes, we just walk side-by-side in silence. No judging. No rock throwing.  Just supporting.  Love may not always win but it does always help at the time.

“When we know better, we do better.”